Lately I have been thinking about how I really want to escape, not like getting suicidal or anything but I REALLY want to get away from here and just tour around the world for a while. I don't know; maybe for a few months or something. Of course I had been thinking about it every now and then but lately this need has increased within me. I think I am also in depression because I looked to symptoms of depression in the Internet and most of the symptoms match with what I am going through right now. It is absolutely unbelievable but I totally don't feel like eating anything for a week (You can also say I am feeding on chocolate ) and this is not me normally. I cannot focus as well and the other day I was on my way to Aachen with a friend and this other friend talked about how the Germans are so hard-working and that one of my friends knocked the door of this german friend one day to invite her to watch TV and she found her with her notes,already fallen asleep and this really got me down. Me? I sit on the desk trying to concentrate and I can't, I get busy with the laptop blablablabla and then somebody invites me to go out and I go out because I am so bored of "trying to study" thing. Everybody is so succesful and they manage everything (this includes cleaning their rooms, partying,studying all at the same time) and I cannot even do these properly.
When I say to people that I am a failure, they say "no" but I actually am.
I really want to get away. I wish I had the money though.
Oh and, the germans in my uni SUCK (no offense to my german friends here ). They think they are something but they are just shit. My sympathy for them has been decreasing day by day.